Body Wash For The Elderly, Body Wash For The Young

And Leo right smack in between them, in many ways.

Recently, I fell into a terrifying rabbit hole reading about Old Person Smell, which is exactly what you likely thought of when you read those three words: the specific, not-technically-unpleasant-but-certainly-familiar aroma you sometimes get a whiff of whilst hanging with the elderly. And I’m going to drag you into that hole with me! Apparently researchers believe that Old Person Smell is not some imaginary ageist b.s., caused by our own terror of personally aging, but rather is real, likely due to how the fatty acids on your skin oxidize with time — possibly helped along, for women, by menopause. Horrifyingly, these same scientists claim that the changes which cause Old Person Smell start (please brace yourself) AROUND AGE 40. Obviously, I gasped with horror when I read this. I did not realize I needed to worry about this so soon! Am I too late? I’m 48! That is eight years into my potential Smell Metamorphosis. I didn’t think I smelled like Old Person, but how would I know?!? I mig…