Open the Sears Christmas Catalog, and Eyeball the New Met Gala Theme

One of them involves ventriloquists.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I’d bought a Sears Christmas catalog while in a fugue state over the summer, and that I was planning to dive into it sometime soon. Well! Congrats! Because soon is now. First, and of absolute importance for fellow fans of procrastination you can do on your computer that might look like work to someone sitting across the room: This website has seemingly digitized and uploaded a shitload of holiday catalogs, dating from 1930. And not just Sears! JC Penney and Montgomery Ward, too. Are you updating that widgets spreadsheet, or eyeballing the 1976 Montgomery Ward Christmas book? Your boss will never know! At least, not until she wanders up behind you and wonders, “Why are you looking at an ad for my grandma’s flatware?”

The subject of today’s inquiry lives in my hot little hands, though, and not the internet: The Sears 1981 Wish Book, Midwest/East Edition. (I did not know Sears had regional versions, but this makes sense.)

This is, as you might imagine, a p…