Are We All Gonna Get Stress Ulcers During Paris 2024?

Should we do it TOGETHER? Also: important shoe news.

We’re in a robust sports season right now, between Euro 2024, the Copa America, Wimbledon, and the U.S. Olympic trials, all of which have me yelling a variety of things at my television set — but only one of which has me watching through my fingers.

Somewhere in the last several Olympics cycles, I lost the ability to watch figure skating and gymnastics live. I am someone who gladly will record sporting events in which I have a rooting interest and work to stay unspoiled until I can watch, yet with these, I have to know the outcome for my nerves to tolerate the tension. If a swimmer loses, generally they climb out of the pool with their spines intact; if a hurdler falls, I HATE it, and I GASPED when Athing Mu tripped in the 800-meter trials. But experiencing that in real time doesn’t turn my palms clammy the way they get when the artistic gymnasts walk out. I am pretty sure I can trace this to 1996. You can land wrong on the floor, and you can hurt yourself on the vault — as Kerri Strug…